2005-2006 Quotes

Andy Bost: "Where's the bitter old man?"
Someone else:  "Who, Ginsburg?"
 Andy: "No, Flum."

"If you jam your head into the corner over there, you can totally see your hand four times!"

 -Neil

"Look, I'm a towel head."

 -Neil

"Indians sink in water."

 -Neil

"Hey, do you guys think these are my pants?"

 -Paul

"Shame on this party- it destroyed my pants."

 -Heckelman

"We did see boobs."

 -MK, regarding Mardi Gras

"Owe!  My knee nice wood."

 -Paul

"I totally peed in the pool house.  Is that bad?"

 -Paul

"We need to get the core of the team together and do acid."

 -Max

"H-okay, nice to meet you."

 -MK, to Julia as she's leaving

"I'm Bleeding!  Awesome!  Where the fuck is Heckelman???"

 -Neil

"I can be uncooperative sometimes, but if somebody tells me to drink more it makes me feel like I'm behind so I try to catch up.  Turns out I was trying to catch up to myself all night...but I didn't know that until Ben told me that I won the party."

 -Neil, reflecting

"Don't do drugs."

 -MK's Fortune Cookie

"I've had it with pants, I quit."

 -Teresa

"Flum!?  What the hell kind of a name is that?"

-Andrea

"Short women sometimes scare me."

-Teresa

"Ultimate is such a hippie sport.  Dude, you call your own penalties.  Give me a break!"

-Andrea

"Oh, I didn't know what shape it was.  I just ate it."

-Mary Kay

Heard: "I'm just wet and horny."

Actually said: "I'm just wet and chlorinated."

-Lauren, after swimming

"After you've gone 130, 100 just doesn't feel that fast."

-Lauren after riding with Traverso, the speed demon

"Lauren, how does it feel to have my head between your legs?"

-Darren

"More frisbee, less cooties."

-Teresa and Jessica to Hsing Hui, when she went to go huck with the boys.

"I'll sleep with anyone, anywhere."

-Shira

"It's always messy when I go down."

-Ellen

"I love your women's team's name... it works on so many levels."

-Colorado State guy

Teresa:  "We're all marrying Shane and having his babies."

Jessica:  ."You mean we have to marry him to have them?"

"They might fornicate, but we fuck in tents."

-Shira

"Hey, baby"

-Glasscock to Shira

Neil:  "Who is a terrorist?"

Paul:  "Jihad"

Neil:  "That's me!"

"Ginsburg, why did you shave everything off? of your face?"

-Lauren

"I will put it in to the women. I'm not gonna force it in, I'm not gonna stick it in real hard.  I will do it with style."

-Mr. Smooth

"You just wrap around her torso and start applying pressure."

-Flum

"It doesn't taste like blood, it tastes like Koolaid."

-Neil

"There's a bottlecap in the bottom."

-Ben, on the beverage he prepared for Neil

"In russia, vodka drink you"

- Traverso, with an accent

"She's a big bag of fucking crazy."

-Darren, in reference to Elsa

"I'm sober."

-Neil

"Get off me, you bag of shit."

-Shane to Marshall

Collectively:  "Lauren!"

Shane:  "Show us your boobies!"

Doug:  "The atmosphere is electric."

Max:  "They came to play tonight!"

-referring to Lauren and Teresa (not) making out

"I'm not asking you to make out with me.  I'm asking you to make out with her, and I will eat paint!!!"
-Doug, to Teresa, referencing Lauren

Ellen:  "I haven't eaten anything fruity lately."

Hsing-Hui:  "Except for Lee!"

"Can you lick my legs?"

-Lauren to Shira

"Can you give me some advice about magnetic flux?"

-Elaine to Jessica

"Neil is a desired commodity."

-(women's team concensus)

"I would fuck the pecans."

-MK to Jack

"I'm so in awe of Brooks' flying hotness that I can't perform sexually."

-Lauren

"I'm still contemplating the intricacies of sucking face before I execute."

-Teresa, as MK

Lauren: "We have a loveless marriage."

MK:  "You don't call that love?"

"So, do these hybrid human-pecan children have souls?"
-Ellen, getting to the heart of the matter

Marry Bury Fuck:

-Vegantine with eggs

-Darren without Borders

-Brokeback Glick

"1-800-HIS-EGGS"

- seen on the back of an 18-wheeler

 

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