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| | Mr. Perkins |
| Status: | Graduate |
| Age: | Legal |
| Height: | 6'0 |
| Bio 06: | Mr. Perkins is a captain this year.
"I would be happy to be known as Mr. Perkins." |
| Bio 05: | A common saying posits that: "There are two sure things in life: death and taxes." We beg to differ. There is yet a third sure thing in life: finding an email from Mr. Perkins in your inbox on Thursday night regarding the Importance of Pub Attendance. In fact, it's not just one email, it's several. If Eric hadn't already claimed the title, Mr. Perkins would definitely be considered for the "Always in Attendance at Pub" award. But on to the real reason Mr. Perkins cares about pub.... It's not about ultimate bonding as he would have you believe. It's really about the BOOZE. Champion of the boat racing team and thrower of memorable ultimate parties, Mr. Perkins is a reminder that ultimate and alcohol are often synonomous. Oh, and speaking of ultimate, Mr. Perkins also throws pretty good swill that he makes up for through monster layouts that don't quite make it into the end zone. When all's said and done, however, Mr. Perkins' unique combination of skills makes him a formidable member of Cloud 9.
Perkins, Perkins, burning bright,
In Willy’s Pub Thursday night,
What woman's hand could tame you?
Chuggin Frisbees full of brew?
On the field you do excel,
In making hot bids from hell.
Your forehand hucks are ideal
and you show at practice unlike Neal.
What would we do sans your style?
Or your radiant smile?
We would hold our heads in despair,
And spend our Thursdays without beer.
Est-ce que tu es un amateur? |
| Bio 03: | As one of Cloud 9's newest players, Mighty Mr. Perkins makes up in spirit for the game what he lacks in experience. Even though he has little use of his left hand (he injured it while completely dominating...oops, we shouldn't be talking about that), you can count on him not only showing up but going all-out and working hard at every practice. Mr. Perkins can throw a backhand with intimidating speed, thus helping to earn him the the award "most likely to take someone's head off with a frisbee" among Baker freshmen, and he has almost perfectly resurrected "Earth's" sliding-on-his-knees catch. Given his normally unassuming nature, Mr. Perkins is also surprisingly active in the Cloud 9 party scene, never hesitating to help his team to a boat race victory (see Mighty Mr. Perkins in action) or to show off his best dance moves for the camera. Plus, he's so popular with the ladies that they reportedly bought him an intimate lap-dance at a strip joint coming back from Fayetteville. In fact, Mr. Perkins recently became only the second Cloud 9 member this spring to earn some chicken w..... oh yeah, that's right, Mr. Perkins is one of those "vegetarian" people and thus does not eat chicken wings. However, for this guy, beer will serve as perfectly good substitute. |
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