HOMECOMING - EVOLUTION

--"Go Rice" onto field

Formation: MOB

Music: TURNING IT LOOSE

at end of song...

ANNOUNCER: Many scientists believe that the MOB evolved from primitive ape-like beings, although most believe that primitive ape-like beings evolved from the MOB. Creationists believe that the MOB simply appeared in December of 1971. For homecoming we will set this misconception to rest as we go back to the very beginning, to examine the Evolution of the MOB... Billions and billions of years ago, the Earth was a molten mass. Slowly, the Earth cooled...

MOB: GET ON WITH IT!

ANNOUNCER: Oh, all right - we won't go that far back. The origins of the MOB really begin about five million years ago, when primitive hominids first learned the secret of Rock Music...

Music: GRUNTED LOUIE in place of cowbell, SA in gorilla suit bangs rocks together. Perhaps more people with rocks try to act like the drum noise is coming from rock banging.

ANNOUNCER: Evolution took a major leap forward with the development of musical notes. However, the primitive Hunter-Gatherer Bands of the Stone Age were not aware of the limitations of stone as a material for musical instruments, while we -(pause) - take it for granite.

Music: FLINTSTONES

Formation: DINOSAUR

Action`: SA's try to play stone instruments without notable success. There are, however, notable accidents as the mind-bogglingly heavy instruments fall on their players or others helping to hold them. These players are all dressed in Flintstone-style costumes.

ANNOUNCER: Fossil records show that many of these early forms of MOBster soon became extinct. We have with us today, however, actual living specimens of the ancestral MOB species: Australopithecus Alumnus. These survivors of the ICE AGE or BIG CHILL will now perform a carefully restored classic from their long-vanished era. Here they are, perfectly preserved, the RICE ALUMNI BAND.

Music: ROCK AROUND THE CLOCK

Formation: TIMELINE with a change to script Rice at end

ANNOUNCER: Finally, Evolution reached its ultimate peak and the modern MOB appeared. As primitive, vestigial traits such as marching vanished, the MOB began to spread outward, sweeping all other life forms aside until it finally achieved its present position of halftime supremacy. We've come a long way...

Music: RICE'S HONOR by both bands

followed by:

Music: LOUIE, LOUIE start it by grunting, to indicate that absolutely nothing has really changed.

NOTE: DO NOT READ THIS SENTENCE