Update: Splendid Shaolin Master, Skyfox (Carl Cramér), has organized a co-operative game to write these moves up as fu schticks for Feng Shui. I must bow to this superior effort. My part was relatively easy!
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Updated: Fri Nov 20 17:31:02 CST 2009 inverted ghost advance savage lotus slice monkey king's star defiance amazing chopstick style sacred monster arrow 10,000 hell strike running goldfish claw poetic demon justice naughty plum-blossom spear vicious taoist tackle heavenly hummingbird leap jumping wind scratch jumping peony-blossom fury murderous chopstick breath evil ancestor elbow dreaded sky throw celestial sage bow midnight secret spirit mongolian crane power shaolin rooster wrestling dipping dragon energy wicked fairy tackle dirty ram boxing invisible mist charge monkey king's spider fan super dream shield resplendent jade defiance stunning river forehead destructive orchid spirit savage plum-blossom slash invincible monster attack happy scarecrow protection thundering ram scare enlightened rat pounce drunken wolf nerve pinch blind grasshopper bite roaring chopstick touch no sun charge ruinous sun claw vicious buddha crush peaceful ancestor technique amazing orchid attack abominable sun touch destructive foo-dog tackle double vampire touch terrible snake technique deadly vampire kung-fu lethal orchid hand deadly wizard fright unfathomable jade hands dirty turtle sword midnight terror attack dipping dragon strike sound of the buddha slap excellent dragon lunge super sun armor 10,000 monkey hands jumping shaolin slice ancient ghost smash devastating taoist spear heavenly rooster attack impossible snake forehead valorous zodiac flip iron ram cut sacred monkey chop mongolian ox slap innocent immortal pounce barbaric vampire sword lucky sage slice fiendish moon palm excellent grasshopper wheel deadly hell slam judicious monk tackle vicious lightning fan sign of the fox-woman onslaught whooping chopstick forehead yellow emperor's ghost neck-snap invisible phoenix vengeance mighty hell flip impressive ram attack standing shadow arrow two hawk technique fang of the rat contact mad wind touch deceptive phoenix flip no lotus scratch shining jade kick no dream feint leaping eagle scare resplendent sky claw transcendent virgin cut resplendent vampire spirit midnight fairy hands peaceful scorpion style lethal panda fright sign of the plum-blossom knee dreaded fox-woman fury dirty willow stance monkey king's moon dance no willow protection murderous sky dance resplendent acupuncture smash vicious virgin push yellow emperor's gecko kung-fu mystic scorpion blow mongolian tiger palm poetic immortal elbow 10,000 vampire fan spinning scorpion bow naughty bamboo claw insane orchid assault mongolian demon jab stunning rabbit vengeance mongolian dragon scare deceptive scholar cut destructive spider heel wicked dragon kick savage fox-woman feet super willow claw mongolian spider vengeance fiendish ox nerve pinch magnificent bamboo strike roaring sun onslaught spinning monk assault abominable scarecrow wheel impressive ancestor assault resplendent mantis strike excellent patriarch thrust masculine qi block invisible death charge deceptive grasshopper punch two tiger hammer blood of the shadow style burning secret kung-fu poetic dream claw poetic mantis dance heavenly mist knife destructive willow fright savage jade somersault fang of the terror wall blind scholar fist midnight jade ambush happy death spin terrible monster palm vicious killer hands strange mustard-seed pounce devastating shadow style ruinous eunuch wall judicious lightning kung-fu strange ox slam dipping sky chop shining willow bow monkey king's moon somersault shaolin ox feint murderous dragon charge naughty turtle tackle pious mist justice celestial snake contact naughty mantis justice lucky foo-dog contact midnight goldfish forehead ten ghost penetration running ox slash fang of the monkey spear celestial flash protection impossible wind attack vulgar sage shield amazing terror somersault vicious qi slice roaring plum-blossom jab glorious vampire fright magnificent mantis pounce deceptive eagle palm double patriarch style supernatural paradise vengeance ruinous spider spin leaping mustard-seed technique illusory foo-dog kick midnight vampire style deadly fox-woman crush lethal bamboo technique evil phoenix flip insane shadow push yellow emperor's dragon hand mongolian moon defiance excellent plum-blossom block yellow emperor's scholar attack glorious serpent spear drunken secret spin lethal terror contact dipping ram spin heavenly scarecrow arrow dancing eunuch pose fiendish acupuncture technique vulgar lightning feet seven zodiac breath monkey king's scorpion twist invisible flash fist magnificent killer smash mongolian eunuch touch monkey king's killer fright pious hell slice innocent mantis wall honorable terror onslaught sign of the river protection dancing cricket penetration unfathomable monster style emasculating river breath roaring patriarch technique inverted mantis punch honorable mantis throw three zodiac boxing glorious rat somersault magnificent dream bite dipping monk defiance fragrant mist chop shaolin tiger advance blood of the butterfly slam two qi frenzy barbaric acupuncture scare fang of the virgin hand vicious terror knife iron zodiac pounce lucky cat assault fortunate ram technique fragrant eunuch pounce amazing shaolin touch ten virgin slash celestial qi punch peaceful moon fright iron goldfish tackle thundering storm advance double bamboo sword blind fox-woman armor mongolian flash arrow midnight eagle hammer valorous zodiac slap stunning sage pounce mad chopstick justice invisible zodiac heel sacred goldfish antagonism illusory paradise throw mystic turtle penetration super moon feet flying orchid antagonism blind buddha feet naughty storm attack fang of the secret seizure illusory monk fan mad phoenix bite midnight river maneuver uncomfortable patriarch spin excellent ghost justice super secret dance imperial monk scare deadly storm jab amazing phoenix slice iron hummingbird smash whirling grasshopper ambush judicious immortal touch double hawk boxing two monk palm yellow emperor's flash lunge fragrant ancestor sword whooping demon fist resplendent demon elbow honorable lotus attack innocent buddha style mad jade feint poetic zodiac claw iron storm bow judicious qi onslaught fierce storm blow fierce snake kung-fu drunken patriarch feint evil tiger defiance excellent sky wrestling fierce cricket frenzy fragrant scholar essence magnificent chopstick fan impressive fairy shield screaming dragon wheel dirty ancestor block illusory monk defiance blind moon feet monkey king's wolf nerve pinch golden foo-dog power naughty animal lunge wicked peony-blossom heel shining monster smash super hell arrow screaming immortal hammer ruinous crane style uncomfortable ghost onslaught emasculating storm defense masculine bamboo kung-fu enlightened plum-blossom claw dirty immortal hands resplendent hell kung-fu ten wolf hands yellow emperor's fairy fright stunning star kick savage peony-blossom defiance supernatural buddha shield resplendent snake throw drunken sun contact whooping flash hammer mongolian cricket bite mongolian wizard style dancing mist scratch inverted scholar chop dancing rabbit ambush vicious jade elbow valorous mustard-seed feet seven immortal thrust standing terror elbow heavenly grasshopper technique innocent rooster defiance uncomfortable sage style explosive scarecrow penetration savage star maneuver accurate shaolin feet splendid wind chop ten ghost energy jumping paradise attack seven scorpion slice unfathomable foo-dog tackle ten cricket fury fang of the eunuch hands pious qi style barbaric phoenix breath imperial death fist laughing phoenix fan terrible killer technique yellow emperor's panda fan shining fox-woman jab imperial orchid claw no animal power honorable zodiac energy seven death slap shining scarecrow elbow spinning monkey hammer monkey king's paradise slam insane willow thrust abominable hell neck-snap spinning ram feint wicked acupuncture somersault mongolian taoist frenzy barbaric ox fury fiendish moon push glorious ghost chop explosive zodiac technique glorious taoist dance innocent mustard-seed claw blood of the killer fury ten zodiac shield fang of the acupuncture tackle valorous scorpion leap illusory terror tackle whirling monkey boxing mongolian rat kung-fu golden rabbit knee celestial demon attack impressive terror hands judicious turtle knife vicious goldfish feint midnight scholar spear celestial mantis cut terrible orchid pose fiendish star defense fragrant ghost attack fire of the turtle attack iron goldfish slap glorious rooster forehead 10,000 monk claw accurate hell elbow monkey king's hell dance fierce qi power 10,000 flash knee screaming ghost lunge stunning taoist stance two rat justice whooping turtle wheel mad rooster scratch imperial dragon seizure barbaric monster wall running acupuncture smash super demon forehead abominable tiger scratch vicious killer kung-fu deceptive gecko technique double ram block poetic qi feet ancient sun hammer blood of the serpent fan venerable river leap laughing goldfish maneuver fierce mustard-seed palm innocent turtle fan savage scarecrow penetration super patriarch dance yellow emperor's goldfish scare fortunate rat bow monkey king's flash vengeance abominable cricket fan roaring jade throw fang of the hummingbird fury pious virgin tackle pious monkey kung-fu imperial sun contact screaming mantis heel running butterfly stance heavenly eunuch vengeance pious qi leap monkey king's immortal chop iron monster pose illusory shaolin chop super zodiac forehead lucky plum-blossom arrow valorous gecko leap running fox-woman spin jumping jade neck-snap sign of the vampire flip impossible qi nerve pinch golden storm technique evil killer attack monkey king's dragon attack ten dragon breath blind vampire stance vicious crane justice murderous ancestor defiance dipping peony-blossom strike wicked fox-woman tackle burning paradise power dancing storm blow three plum-blossom chop mongolian rooster pose poetic monkey ambush celestial willow armor dirty patriarch bow transcendent snake feint standing gecko fright glorious sky rebuke poetic scarecrow smash sign of the ram heel fortunate hawk style mighty storm slice imperial hawk forehead wicked orchid heel standing jade leap dreaded butterfly power venerable rooster kung-fu innocent tiger hammer devastating rabbit style magnificent secret cut sacred shaolin knife fragrant animal hammer enlightened dream cut golden wizard spin shaolin acupuncture crush vulgar flash arrow uncomfortable gecko energy burning animal throw evil hawk spear whirling terror defiance murderous secret pounce shining wind cut excellent demon tackle imperial shaolin spin strange dragon advance supernatural panda seizure invincible death chop vulgar goldfish slash transcendent willow feint unfathomable taoist attack fang of the panda slice terrible plum-blossom chop accurate hawk assault imperial lightning contact sound of the secret tackle devastating peony-blossom slap enlightened lotus chop uncomfortable acupuncture advance lethal hummingbird slice invincible acupuncture vengeance naughty killer contact murderous plum-blossom feet masculine cricket justice emasculating storm energy celestial death spear transcendent dream protection super dragon hands destructive vampire chop jumping crane sword ancient phoenix sword fortunate terror hand excellent ox slice evil hawk feet sign of the virgin contact fiendish hawk sword